Kindness

Kindness is rooted in Old English words for family, kin and tribe.

I think it is a product of the days when feelings of kindness were reserved for members of one's own family or tribe. All others were outsiders and foreigners, suspect and feared until proven otherwise. Such feelings were necessary when residents of the cave on the other side of the valley were likely to steal your food, or your woman, if given the chance. Strangers were suspicious and certainly were not shown kindness since that would risk one's own best interests.

As the world has grown smaller, the need to think of strangers or different people as threatening has also grown smaller. Yet that instinct is still with us and is hard to overcome. It's easier to fall back on instinct and prejudice and treat someone from a different race, culture or country as suspect. Our guard goes up quickly. Kindness is a last resort when faced with the scary outsider.

Yet, the way we think of our family and close friends is the way we should think of the rest of our brothers and sisters in the whole human race. In my travels throughout the world I've found that regular people are the same everywhere. The politicians and rulers may be different but people are the same and deserve our kindness.

The Golden Rule applies to kindness just as it does to other forms of human interaction. Treat others with kindness just as you would like to be treated kindly.

Kindness goes deeper than politeness or courtesy but encompasses both. We can show kindness by returning the shopping cart someone else left running wild in the parking lot. Make an extra effort to show kindness to the aggressive driver or the single driver taking advantage of HOV bypass lanes at freeway on-ramps and diamond lanes on the freeway.

As I've grown older I try to imagine it's my wife, sibling, son or daughter-in-law driving and respond gently and kindly when someone cuts me off or acts unkindly. Sometimes we just don't know what others are feeling or suffering. If there are two ways of interpreting another's action choose the one that shows kindness. That will give the other person the benefit of the doubt, spread a little kindness and reduce your stress level.

Buddhism and Hinduism have a concept called karma where past and present actions influence your future. It's nice to have another person reciprocate, but kindness can be its own reward.

Be watchful for a chance to demonstrate kindness. Do what you can to make a pleasant world, earn some good karma and relax in a happier and lower stress day.